Then put your little hand in mine....

there ain't no hill or mountain we can't climb....

Groundhog Day.

On the surface, I think this is a "good" movie because it has good writing, a great comic actor, Bill Murray, some good supporting roles, and a unique premise.

I'm a big fan of movies and books that portray a "normal" world where everything is consistent with the reality in which we all dwell, except for a little twist.

I dig this concept pretty much however it's conceived, whether the twist comes from: a technological advance, like in Jurassic Park; a discovery, like in Congo or Sphere (mmkay, so I like Michael Crichton, and I mean the BOOKS, because apparently someone always decides to put a few spoonfuls of crap into the mix when they turn his sci-fi books into movies) or the introduction of some element of fantasy or science fiction, as in the Anne Rice Vampire Chronicles (Interview with the Vampire, et al.) or Piers Anthony's Incarnations of Immortality.

Aside: That last one is actually a pretty decent series. Not the toughest reads in the world in terms of sophistication of prose, but then again, neither are J.K. Rowlings' books and well, I think it's the understatement of the decade to say that those books have a "solid following." Anyways, the first one is On a Pale Horse, and introduces the premise that there are individuals who are the incarnations of, and therefore have the responsibility of governing, such far-reaching parts of life as Nature, War, Fate, Time, Good, Evil, and, as the title of the first book in the series hints, Death. Some of the books are hit or miss, but the ones on Death and Evil are both very enjoyable; as a very human face is put on some of the elements of life that are most feared and hated.

Aside-to-the-Aside: (Yes, I can do that, it's my blog damnit!) Or maybe I just liked those books best because I first read them in my angsty teenage years when me and some of my friends wore trenchcoats to high school. Yeah, we beat those Columbine punks to the "Trenchcoat Mafia" idea by a long shot, and they had to go give angsty kids who play Dungeons & Dragons and video games a bad name!

I tell you what, and this comes from a hardcore Star Wars geek, Anthony does a hell of a better job of illustrating a "fall from grace" than Lucas's effort at portraying Anakin's transformation into Darth Vader. I'm putting another post on the back burner that's all about my love for the "sympathetic" villian; it's hard to do right, but man, when it's good, it's REALLY good. While I thought Episode III was the best of the (bad) prequels, you can imagine my disappointment with Lucas when it's like, "Alright Hayden, now, in this scene, right after you just attacked Mace Windu, you're going to uh.. just start being REALLY bad. You were conflicted before, but now, what the hell, you're just an evil sonuvabitch." Sigh.

Anyways, prior to that tangent extraordinaire, I think I was talking about Groundhog Day, and that on the surface, I love it for: a) being funny (Harold Ramis is a comedic badass), and for, b) being a normal world with a little twist.

Under the surface, however, I love it for a different reason; and this is the real reason why it makes my list of movies that I'm compelled to watch when I see it's on.

I love this movie because part of me wants to be able to bowl over a woman with such powerful perfection. But, as it's portrayed in the movie, perfection isn't always what it seems to be. The days that Phil spends lavishing attention on Rita, where he has everything she loves laid out for her; the typical definition of showing a woman "the perfect night," those are the days he only gets so far before he creeps her out and gets smacked in the face. Phil finally succeeds when he completes his change into being a genuinely great person to everyone, and, it's when Rita sees that, she ultimately falls for him.

Even though he learns EVERYTHING about her, it's not the fact that he knows she loves Rocky Road and French poetry; it isn't that knowledge that empowers him. He learns that he loves her because she's an amazing person and is so kind to others; (he tells her this when she's half-asleep after the card-tossing-into-the-hat scene. And yes, I just saw it, so I'm not a total freak and have the movie memorized) and it's his own transformation into a person that cares for other people that seals the deal.

So, if you're ridiculously overanalyzing the movie like I am right now, you draw the conclusion that you don't need the eternity that Phil had to show someone that you're what they're looking for; or, if you do, you don't need to spend it on her, you need to spend it on you.

A "Very Special" Episode of My Blog

I sort of made a pact with myself that I wouldn't use this blog to talk about specific detailed updates and accounts of and on relationships that I may or may not be having. I want this to be a place where I could try and figure myself out, and hopefully find a kindred spirit or two out there by pontificating on my personal quirks and idiosynchracies.

Of course, because I just wrote that preface, you know I'm a little iffy about my adherence to that rule vis a vis the forthcoming post.

But don't worry, this isn't going to be a cryfest, what happened was actually a happy event.

Here we go with preamble #2...

I'm a long term relationship guy. I'm not really interested in spending time with, (and serious emotional currency on), someone unless I get to know them first, and if I like them as a friend, I can then make the decision that I want to (or not) take the next step; if I do, I'm in it for the long haul. When I say long haul, I mean that I can count all my relationships on one hand, from high school to now; and more than half of those relationships have been for 2 years or more.

This sounds all well and good right? I'm not afraid to commit, (but I kind of am... more on that some other time), but for a modern guy in the modern dating world, this is probably not the smartest idea, because I therefore have no "in-between game" where you can be friendly with someone, but still be "dating." I tend to skip that part and elongate the other parts, namely, the "tension-filled, before anything major has happened" phase and the "we spend so much time with each other it's enough to make others nauseous" phase.

Being with someone for several years, I obviously get very emotionally attached, and it's hard for me to really feel like I have a clean slate after a break-up. It takes me a long time before I stop thinking about an ex consciously; and I don't really ever forget anyone completely.

It's not like I wax nostalgic on all the good times, nor do I long to be back together with that person; it's just that when you're with someone for a long time, a little bit of them just becomes a part of you, and certain things that you experience in life just become associated with that person, even after their gone.

Here's an illustrantion. My buddy, who was engaged back in college, forever associates the smell of chlorine with his ex-fiance, since she swam competitively while they were dating in high school and college.

So, to review...

1) I'm a long term relationship guy.

2) It takes me a long time to get over a woman I was with for more than 2 years, even if the break up was mutual and necessary.

So, what happened to me, and how does this become a happy post??

I bumped into my last girlfriend (I don't want to call her my ex.. it's been a long time, and she's moved on, so it's not really like that) the other day, and normally, when something like this happens, if we talk on the phone or exchange emails or whatever, even though the conversation is totally amiable and we laugh and everything is sort of water under the bridge, (and even though I know our relationship needed to end when it did for both our sakes), I tend to dwell on it the rest of the day, and think about my issues and start questioning whether I'm a decent human being or not... blah blah.

But the other day, I was fine. It was totally okay, I didn't dwell on the meeting any more than being happy about knowing that all the wounds had healed.

I've definitely felt "over" (I hate using that word, though, it doesn't seem appropriate) my last relationship for a long time now, but it just felt good to have the waters get tested and come out feeling good about the whole thing.

Why the hell do I do this? Episode III: I am TV Masochist.

TV Masochist: (n.) One who purposely watches television programs (esp. reality shows) that contain elements that make one feel upset, perhaps to somehow replace one's lack of feeling or otherwise boring life with a safe experience of extreme emotion.

All you reality show haters out there, well, sorry, but when it comes to reality TV, I often get hooked. I guess I'm into the vicarious living. (Cindy's got a great blog, by the way, and posts a hell of a lot more often than me)

Here's a few shows, in no particular order, that range from me being hugely devoted to(read: TiVo Season Pass, never miss an episode, even when I do I download it off the Internet), or the show at least at some point moved me.

Aside: Now, this certainly doesn't embody all the TV I watch, (boy is that a scary preamble..) but this list includes all the shows that I remember finding myself getting teary at. And yes, I'm a guy and I cry at the TV when no one else is around. I'll never successfully feign machoness, so I might as well embrace the fact that I'm a sensitive doughboy.

• The Amazing Race
• Survivor
  
• Intervention
• The First 48
  
• 30 Days
• The Apprentice
  
• The Contender
• Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
• The Biggest Loser
• Eco-Challenge
• Joe Schmo
• American Idol
• The Ultimate Fighter

And unfortunately, the list doesn't end there. I don't know what it is, but if someone's on TV and there's real emotions involved, they can get me goin'. I've been known to get into such crap as Wife Swap and Boot Camp. It's pretty sad.

Aside: If the show is an "elimination" type of show that has seasons and a real episode order, I tend to follow my normal M.O. for watching fictional TV Shows, which is to binge on these shows. I watch several episodes back-to-back in a sitting. Of course, you need a TiVo or other DVR, or a large collection of shows on your computer or on DVD to do this, but it's my favorite way to get my fix. :)

Now, you may recall that I had a disclaimer for the "reality show haters" in the beginning. Why do some people just hate reality shows? Now, there certainly are some shows that are ill-conceived at best, and blatantly bad rip-offs at worst, but if a show can convince me that the people involved are really emotionally changed, I get into it.

Holy Crap This is a Huge Aside: You also might recall that I put Joe Schmo up there as one of the shows. This definitely wasn't a popular show, it was on Spike TV, and the premise was a sort of "Truman Show" spin: They made a fake "live in a house and do stupid shit while trying not to get eliminated" reality show, with all actors playing stereotypical reality show people, like "The Bitch," "The Gay Guy," "The Asshole," etc, Except forone guy, who was a real guy thinking he was on a reality show.

For that guy, they went and found the nicest, most unassuming, naive, yet charmingly sincere guy they could find. They really couldn't have picked a better guy.

Now, you'd think that the show would be all about this guy and his emotional roller coaster as the show was SO over-the-top doing crazy things to mess with this guy's head, and the actors were playing such wacked characters that he might be suspecting that something wasn't right. And for the most part, that was what the show was about; and that stuff was VERY interesting.

But what it really came down to that made the show great was that all of the actors, writers, and staff just totally fell in love with this guy, and the people that were scripted to do mean things to him really didn't want to, the actors that were his "friends" really became really close with him, it was really great stuff. If you haven't seen it, it's definitely worth it.

Anyways, getting back to the topic of the post; the biggest tearjerker on the list for me has to be Intervention. Seeing people hit rockbottom is emotionally jarring, and makes me appreciate what I have, but at the same time reminds me of how sheltered I am.

I've never been really addicted to anything, and to see these people give up everything that they care about to get high; it's hypnotic. I'm glad that they keep it real (sigh, can't believe I used that phrase) and show the people that punk out on the Interventions too. It keeps with the show's theme about being brutally honest.

Aside: Crystal Meth is FUCKED UP. Just about every other show has some young guy or gal who's f'd up on Crystal Meth, and they just don't care about anything else; they're totally different people.

Well, at least my pantheon of emotion by osmosis is only limited to reality shows. At least I'm not watching soap operas, or soap operas for men, also known as professional wrestling. And at least I'm not watching Merideth Baxter Birney movies on Lifetime about strung-out women that get abused and have to stand trial about something usually involving a baby.

Off to bed now; but this weekend I'll probably binge out on Survivor or The Amazing Race. I have about 6 episodes of each sitting on my TiVo. So no spoiling! :D